Freud was right

I think I am suffering from a case of gay camp nostalgia syndrome.


I was messaging my cousin from Dallas and she writes back trying to convince me to come visit her, by promising to find me "a nice cowboy to marry" as well as to wingman for her on her quest to marry her "professional baseball player crush."


Only I read "professional baseball player crush" as "professional butch lesbian crush."


I had to re-read her message a million times to see the proper words. 


What is wrong with me oh my god.


I guess that's just what happens when you spend a weekend with 200 people that you're convinced are your soulmates.


For serious, I would have turned polyamorous for ALL OF THEM. 


And I don't say that about anyone. 


Except for maybe Eva Green and Jeremy Renner, the only 2 people on the planet I have ever seriously considered going poly for. 


But seeing as them ever getting together is quite unlikely and me ever coming across them even more unlikely, and them wanting to sleep with me extremely highly unlikely (you see where I'm going here, 3 levels of unlikelihood is basically synonymous with impossibility) - then really, when you think about it, polyamory is totally off my radar floating in the realm of never going to happen.


Except for all those camp folk. For them, I'd throw all my other preferences out the fucking bulletproof glass window.


I start school tomorrow. I really hope that I don't start reading my textbooks the way I read my cousin's Facebook message. 


This is how you fail class - by falling in love with too many people in too little time. My advice? DON'T DO IT.