FRIEND 1: I knew a girl whose landlords set really bizarre restrictions on her place.
FRIEND 2: Restrictions? Like what kinds?
FRIEND 1: Well, if she was going to take the place, she had to agree to never have any male friends over.
ME: Why is that?
FRIEND 1: I have no idea. It's strange, right?
ME: Why specifically male friends?
FRIEND 1: I'm guessing it was like, an intimacy issue or something? The landlords who owned the house were a gay couple. Maybe they were just protective?
FRIEND 2: Like they didn't want her having sex in their house?
FRIEND 1: Yeah, maybe. I honestly don't know.
ME: That is really strange. But women are allowed over?
FRIEND 2: Yeah.
ME: Why would it even be an issue for them? It's her space.
FRIEND 2: I don't know. Maybe they don't want to hear it because their walls are thin.
ME: Are they uber Christian or something? No sex before marriage type stuff?
FRIEND 2: They're gay.
ME: Yeah, I know. But are they religious?
FRIEND 2: But they're gay though.
ME: Yeah, but you know how some conservative, traditional, religious people are really strict about....
FRIEND 1 + FRIEND 2: No, they're not. They're gay.
There was an awkward pause. In my head, I was going DO I NOT EXIST ALL OF A SUDDEN OR SOMETHING.
So, long story short, moral of the story is: To be gay/queer and to be religious/spiritual/a person of faith - THIS IS NOT A PARADOX. Identifying oneself with a certain religion does not necessarily make one a conservative. Identifying oneself with a certain religion does not necessarily make one traditional. Identifying oneself with a certain religion CERTAINLY DOES NOT MAKE ONE STRAIGHT, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. I know that there are certain people and characteristics we associate with religion (such as political conservatism and strong ties to customs), but these are still blanket notions and stereotypes that don't actually apply to all of us. You could say that I am misunderstanding the definition of religion, that religion is synonymous with conservatism and tradition. But really, I see someone's religion as such a personal experience that I don't think anyone else should have to define it for you.
Your God(s) is/are your God(s), you shouldn't have to be all these specific things in order to believe in your God(s). Belief is separate from all these other notions of religion, you see. Belief in a god/gods does not necessarily have to make you an asshole (even though we have often been associated with these kinds of people). At the same time, being conservative and being traditional does not necessarily make you an asshole. Being an asshole makes you an asshole. I know many open-minded people who are assholes, and I know many close-minded people who are assholes. I also know a lot of good people.
No. Just because I'm Christian does not mean I vote for Stephen Harper. Nor do I take Bill O'Reilly seriously and wear sweater vests like Rick Santorum and have a picture of Kirk Cameron on my bedroom wall.
I listen to the radio and I read banned books and I watch NC-17 movies and I curse like a sailor (only sometimes) and I am semi-familiar with Wittgenstein's philosophies. I also believe in Darwin's theory of evolution.
SHOCKER, right? Then again, who said that all Christians fit in the same box? The same people who said that all people fit in the same box.
I know that many will be ashamed of what I have written in this post, and for that, I am sorry. This is just my perspective on such issues. You will probably think I am totally wrong, and that is a valid opinion. I just don't like being judged based on stereotype and expectation. I'm constantly worried that because I don't fit a mould of a certain doctrine, that I'm just a faker who doesn't actually belong to that doctrine. These are issues that I get anxious about. I'm also worried that associating myself with a certain doctrine with its dark histories would somehow prove the fact that I'm anti-humanist. What I want to get at here is that religion is a human interpretation. But who can say that this interpretation doesn't come from a source that is very real and very present? No one can. You can believe or you can not believe, but either way, we still lose. Our human bodies are Plato's cave, essentially. No matter how much knowledge we grasp, we are still limited to the senses allotted to us by our physical beings. Our physical beings give us religion, they give us science. I am also one of those who doesn't see why science somehow has to trump religion or that religion has to somehow trump science. I never saw them as the same thing. They tell certain truths, yes, but different truths. They are a part of human history and development, and even if you don't believe in one or the other, there is still value in learning both. Why? So we can understand and re-interpret and adapt and develop our arguments and be critical thinkers.
I totally didn't mean to go all philosophical on you there. I just never thought I'd be witness to Queer Christian Erasure but yeah, that's apparently a thing, and I'm glad my friends made me aware of that.
I wasn't angry at them or anything though, I just thought it was interesting the way they processed that part of the conversation. It's strange because queer Christians get crap from both sides: you've got some Christians telling you that you shouldn't be queer because you are Christian, then you've got some non-Christians telling you that you shouldn't be Christian because you are queer. Whatevs, I do what I want.
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